MOVIE REVIEW: Star Wars episode III: Revenge of the Sith (2005)
“Luke I am you father” has only ever been uttered by people writing about the Star Wars film franchise and never by actual characters in the franchise itself. It’s one of those things where the information reported is more appealing to the listener than the actual facts. When it comes to the in-universe history of Star Wars few things stand out like the Clone Wars (a throwaway line in 1977’s Star Wars: A New Hope) and the rise of Darth Vader. Considering the nature of the final — and best — movie in the prequel trilogy covers both subjects, it’s highly respected in fandom circles for filling in the blanks with high levels of meme-able melodrama and sci-fi action. Let’s send the Galactic Republic and the Jedi off with a bang to open up the original trilogy proper.
(SPOILER ALERT; you’ve been warned.)
The Clone Wars are in full effect as the Separatists wage war against the Republic over the core planet of Coruscant, with a high-value Senate hostage held by their leaders Count Dooku (Sir Christopher Lee, The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies [2014], Howling II: Your Sister is a Werewolf [1985]) and the alien cyborg General Grievous. The hostage is none other than Sheev Palpatine (Ian McDiarmid, Sleepy Hollow [1999], Dragonslayer [1981]), so our favorite Jedi Knights are sent to retrieve him: Obi-Wan Kenobi (Ewan McGregor, Birds of Prey [2020], Moulin Rouge [2001]) and Anakin Skywalker (Hayden Christensen, Awake [2007], Outcast [2014]). Though Obi-Wan is temporarily incapacitated in their struggles, Anakin carries their will and ferries them to safety by murdering Count Dooku on Palpatine’s orders.
Old as he may seem, Palpatine has continued to work behind the scenes to trick the Republic into serving him — not the Separatists — as sole ruler of the galaxy. The crafty elder statesman wormed his way into the vulnerable Skywalker’s mind to play on insecurities as the Jedi Knight grows in power, namely Anakin’s anxiety about losing everything over his secret relationship to Padme (Natalie Portman, Garden State [2004], Thor: Love and Thunder [2022]). With her pregnant, the stakes are a lot higher so the old man tempts Anakin with a secret cure to cheat a death Anakin can see with his Force powers — a secret only the Sith know.
Unfortunately for Palpatine, other senior Jedi learn about the old man’s betrayal through Anakin: Mace Windu (Strictly Business [1990], Juice [1994], Django Unchained) and Yoda are dedicated to capturing what Anakin declares to be a Sith Lord. But Anakin’s desire is too strong and he becomes Darth Vader — instrumental in the downfall of the Jedi Order, as well as the establishment of the First Galactic Empire under Palpatine. Though the galactic coup is complete, Obi-Wan tries to end Anakin’s involvement and has to critically injure his friend in a duel on the lava planet Mustafar. Palpatine finds Anakin to be far too valuable to be thrown away, so the newly-minted cyborg Darth Vader stands at the helm of the newly minted Death Star (built from Geonosian plans), enforcing the will of Emperor Palpatine and the Galactic Empire, to give the galaxy “peace” while enacting the revenge of the Sith.
Fear not dear viewer, for a new hope is on the horizon: a contingency plan was put in place to protect Padme’s children. You read that right: before she died, Padme gave birth to twins Leia and Luke — the children of Anakin Skywalker. The babies were separated to hide their presence from their father, with Leia becoming a princess of Alderaan with Senator Bail Organa (Jimmy Smits, Glitz [1988], Solomon & Sheba [1995]) as her adoptive father. Luke would become a moisture farmer on Tatooine with his uncle Owen (Joel Edgerton, Exodus: Gods & Kings [2014], King Arthur [2004]) and aunt Beru (Bonnie Piesse, Love Eterne [2011], My Favorite Girlfiend [2022]). Obi-Wan would watch over Luke on Tatooine, and Yoda would go into exile on the swamp planet of Dagobah. Who could possibly guess the heirs of the Skywalker name, ignorant of their shared heritage, would lead to the fall of a fascist galactic government and save the galaxy nearly twenty years later?
There wasn’t a dry eye in the house when I went to see Revenge of the Sith in theaters.
Everyone in the audience had been waiting for this for six years, starting with the poorly-received The Phantom Menace in 1999 and Attack of the Clones in 2002. We knew the story would end with Darth Vader, but the how and the why hit us all hard. We could all forget the first movie, because THIS movie had everything we were looking for: romance, drama, murder, betrayal, desire, answers to questions, one of the greatest lightsaber duels in Star Wars history, and an honest-to-God star war. At the end of it all, many of us in the audience cried because we could see the tragedy happening but we couldn't hope to change it. If we did, the movies that made the prequels possible would not exist. The craftsmanship that linked this movie to the 1977 movie that started it all (Rogue One would come out in 2016, attempting to further link the franchise trilogies) was appreciated by the different generations of Star Wars fans. People are still making meme references to the franchise’s second-most tragic film. I look back on Revenge of the Sith and know that if someone was too cool to watch the original Star Wars (there are people like that), they’re either watching this film or one of the sequel trilogy. Because the fandom can agree on one thing: this movie is too cool for its own good. In this case, the truth is better than the fiction.
SPECIAL NOTE: You can stop reading here, because the CHOICE CUTS section is just me gushing about the last of the prequels.
CHOICE CUTS:
- PRICELESS QUOTES: “Hello, there.” — Obi-Wan Kenobi, creating a greeting I can’t help but mimic every chance I get.
- Shoutout to Zett Jukassa, one of the hardest padawans out there!
- PRICELESS QUOTES: Watching Darth Vader the cyborg be elevated and ask through the voice modulator “Where is Padme? Is she safe? Is she all right?” had me shook because even though he is in the armor, it’s still Anakin in there.
- Padme’s funeral was one of the saddest things I had seen, especially when it’s revealed she always kept the necklace Anakin made her all the way back in The Phantom Menace.
- PRICELESS QUOTES: “So this is how liberty dies… with thunderous applause.”―Padme to Bail Organa following the Proclamation of the New Order. Keep in mind this was written during the George W. Bush “War on Terror”, where civil liberties were suspended for an entire class of people and a campaign of war held in two countries (one under a false flag for personal reasons) to prevent terrorist attacks, so it stands to reason this was a subtle dig against the regime.
- We need to talk about the wordless scene. Anakin, struggling with inner turmoil in the Jedi Council meeting room, looks out over Coruscant to Padme’s apartments. From her vantage point, Padme looks out the windows. She can feel something, but she’s not sure why she looked to the Jedi Temple just now — maybe she’s just wondering about Anakin. Meanwhile, Anakin’s breaking up and in tears about what he feels he must do to save her. For all the complaints I may make about the wooden dialogue in this film series, THIS SCENE with no dialogue does it all.
- PRICELESS QUOTE: “Anakin’s the father, isn’t he? I’m so sorry.” — Obi-Wan Kenobi, as a final word to Padme after confronting her with news that Anakin has joined the Separatists. Her silence said it all.
- C-3PO had his mind wiped, but R2-D2 did not. One can imagine R2 has seen everything since the Phantom Menace through to The Rise of Skywalker, including Rogue One.
- PRICELESS QUOTES: Anakin and Obi-Wan arguing on Mustafar; the whole thing. While most of the dialog was wooden, it was flammable and is instantly quotable and meme-able. Hayden Christensen’s husky James Earl Jones impression makes it all sound even more ridiculous…except when he said “You will try.” That sent a shiver down my spine.
- Much of what was the Clone Wars was recounted in the Genndy Tartakovsky animated shorts called “Star Wars: Clone Wars”, shown on Cartoon Network. The shorts have since been rendered non-canon after the Disney purchase, an instead replaced with “Star Wars: The Clone Wars”. This poorly animated 3-D cartoon attempts to ape the semi-geometric style of Tartakovsky while adding importance to a previously unknown padawan learner of Anakin Skywalker called Ahsoka Tano. In truth, all it did was create a gateway to more spinoffs and further deviations from established canon.
- PRICELESS QUOTES: “I have seen… a security hologram… of him… killing younglings.” — Obi-Wan Kenobi, letting Padme know what Anakin was up to last night. Look on the bright side: if “younglings” were changed to “Yuenglings”, she’d probably have a problem with that also.
- PRICELESS QUOTES: Palpatine’s story about Darth Plagueis the Wise — one of the greatest monologues in Star Wars canon. Have you heard about it? “It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you.” Palpatine confessed to Anakin, “It’s a Sith legend…” The moment he started talking about Sith anything should have been the moment Anakin struck.
- We need to talk about the opera house scene. So much went into the background of the visuals, only to be thoroughly confusing via lack of context and ultimately ignored in favor of Palpatine’s Dark Side monologue. If there’s a symbol of excess, it’s right here.
- PRICELESS QUOTES: “You are on this Council, but we do not grant you the rank of Master” — Mace Windu, in what might be the last straw on the camel’s back.
- So many people think Anakin is hot and conveniently forgot he murdered children — TWICE.
- PRICELESS QUOTE: “Is he bringing reinforcements?” “He didn’t say…” — Pau’an governor Tion Medon to his lieutenants, after conferring with Obi-Wan to take back the starport.
- All those lovely planets — weird alien jungle planet Felucia, pothole planet Utapau, lava planet Mustafar, forest planet and Wookiee home-world Kashyyyk —and the aliens living on them now suffer under the human-centric Imperial rule and threat of the planet-killing Death Star.
- PRICELESS QUOTES: “Once more the Sith shall rule the galaxy! And we shall have…peace.” — Palpatine/Darth Sidious, lying to Anakin (and us).
- People are still asking what order to watch the Skywalker Saga and there’s a preference (chronological order vs. numerical order).
- DAMN IT JAR-JAR: The Gungan senator treated his emergency powers like a hot-potato and practically handed over the Republic to Palpatine.
